CAR! When things don't go my way, I can get a little upset . I'm an only child. I don't like to share. I'm not a desperate woman. I have the RIGHT assetts. I just don't know why men continue to test me. I wouldn't cheat on me. I am THAT woman. I go through emails. I check phone logs. I snoop through pockets. DON'T lie about where you been. I really hate this side of me. SOME men just never learn.
We were dating for about 6 months. I was totally committed to him. When we first met, I had some doubts. I knew he was dating other women. He said he stopped seeing them. I believed him. There weren't any signs of him cheating, AT FIRST. Then late one night, his phone goes off. He doesn't answer. I knew at that moment what I had to do. I started monitoring his phone. I clocked his schedule. Snooped through his pockets. I knew he was cheating but I couldn't prove it. I purchased a little gadget on-line. It gave me his passwords. Just like I thought, naked pictures of some chick. He must have thought I was playing. I confronted him. He denied knowing where the pictures came from. OK. He was warned. We are still together. I really can't share any more. All I can say is, he WISHES he was STILL SINGLE.
Thursday, September 29, 2011
Tuesday, September 27, 2011
DID I DO SOMETHNG .......
WRONG? Communication today is difficult. The rules are always changing. The dating game is on speed. One day you feel a connection. The next day, you don't. I have good instincts when it comes to men. At least I thought I did. I'm usually one move ahead. I'm not one of those women who thinks we are more than what it is. I get it. I'm not YOUR queen. But I am not used to being a PON.
It was homecoming weekend. Everyone was partying. We literally ran into each other. He was abstract. Not that cute. No real sex appeal. It was just something. Every time we hung out, we had so much fun. Our chemistry was so on point. We loved; the same music, the same TV shows, the same restaurants. He was too good to be true. Every morning I would get a call. I absolutely LOVED his voice. I was getting used to US. It had been about 3 weeks. I was ready to take it further. We were chilling at his apartment. He was always so affectionate. I thought he was going to make a move. He didn't. We just kissed. I didn't think much of it. The next morning. He didn't call. When I tried to call him, I got his voicemail. I didn't understand. He always called in the morning. I started to wonder if something happen to him. Days went by, no call. I was really worried. Then he answered. He acted like I was tripping. It was like he was a different person. No argument. No issues. That was IT. I made up excuses to my self. "I was too much for him". "He didn't want to use me like his other women". "He's going to call and apologize". I never heard from him. I guess all relationships don't fit into the three categories. It was surely less than a season. Not even close to a lifetime. And I NEVER got the reason. Still Single
It was homecoming weekend. Everyone was partying. We literally ran into each other. He was abstract. Not that cute. No real sex appeal. It was just something. Every time we hung out, we had so much fun. Our chemistry was so on point. We loved; the same music, the same TV shows, the same restaurants. He was too good to be true. Every morning I would get a call. I absolutely LOVED his voice. I was getting used to US. It had been about 3 weeks. I was ready to take it further. We were chilling at his apartment. He was always so affectionate. I thought he was going to make a move. He didn't. We just kissed. I didn't think much of it. The next morning. He didn't call. When I tried to call him, I got his voicemail. I didn't understand. He always called in the morning. I started to wonder if something happen to him. Days went by, no call. I was really worried. Then he answered. He acted like I was tripping. It was like he was a different person. No argument. No issues. That was IT. I made up excuses to my self. "I was too much for him". "He didn't want to use me like his other women". "He's going to call and apologize". I never heard from him. I guess all relationships don't fit into the three categories. It was surely less than a season. Not even close to a lifetime. And I NEVER got the reason. Still Single
YOU LIVE WITH YOUR.....
MAMA? Times are tough for everyone. People are living check to check. Gas prices are high. Salaries are low. Our children need more from their parents, longer. The economy has us ALL on edge. People are losing their jobs and their homes. We all are making sacrafices to survive. It's not odd that a man has a roomate. It is odd when that roomate is your MAMA!
I was buying a part for my car. He cracked a joke about my 10 car freshners. We instantly hit it off . He worked downtown at a building near mine. After a few phone calls, we met for lunch. Lunch time started to become OUR time. I looked forward to seeing him everyday. We had alot in common. There was also a strong attraction. Kissing him just felt right. Some weeks went by, we were getting a little too hot and heavy for lunch. I invited him to my place. One thing led to another, we woke up the next morning in my bed. He started to hang out alot at my place. We were together everyday and night. I realized that he had never invited me to his place. I was starting to wonder. I told him I wanted see his spot. He told me that his mother was staying with him. I guess the look on my face said "why"? He proceeded to explain all the financial difficulties she was having. He really wanted to be supportive to his mom. He was a good guy. It was only a temporary situation. He's was at my house everyday anyway. A couple of months went by and I finally met his mother. She was an articulate business woman who was excited to meet me. I was a little confused. She didn't seem down on her luck. The house was a lot nicer than I expected. When he went to the restroom, his mother began thanking me for taking him off her hands. I laughed and told her "you must be tired of living with your son"? She chuckeld and said "I don't LIVE with my son, this is MY house". "I was thanking you for letting him live with you". UHHHHH..
Still Single
I was buying a part for my car. He cracked a joke about my 10 car freshners. We instantly hit it off . He worked downtown at a building near mine. After a few phone calls, we met for lunch. Lunch time started to become OUR time. I looked forward to seeing him everyday. We had alot in common. There was also a strong attraction. Kissing him just felt right. Some weeks went by, we were getting a little too hot and heavy for lunch. I invited him to my place. One thing led to another, we woke up the next morning in my bed. He started to hang out alot at my place. We were together everyday and night. I realized that he had never invited me to his place. I was starting to wonder. I told him I wanted see his spot. He told me that his mother was staying with him. I guess the look on my face said "why"? He proceeded to explain all the financial difficulties she was having. He really wanted to be supportive to his mom. He was a good guy. It was only a temporary situation. He's was at my house everyday anyway. A couple of months went by and I finally met his mother. She was an articulate business woman who was excited to meet me. I was a little confused. She didn't seem down on her luck. The house was a lot nicer than I expected. When he went to the restroom, his mother began thanking me for taking him off her hands. I laughed and told her "you must be tired of living with your son"? She chuckeld and said "I don't LIVE with my son, this is MY house". "I was thanking you for letting him live with you". UHHHHH..
Still Single
Friday, September 23, 2011
I'M GETTING MARRIED...............!!!!!!!!!!!
to the wrong person. It just seemed like the practical thing to do. We were living together. She was a good woman. She was committed to making me happy. All of my friends were getting married. My parents worried that I'm going to end up alone. I'm almost 40. I want children. I guess the CLOCK doesn't just tick for women.
We met at work. I was with someone else at the time. We became friends. After I broke up with my ex, we started dating. On our first date, she told me how she felt. I already knew. She'd been waiting for her turn. Our relationship progressed pretty fast. We went from; dating, to being committed, to living together. I realized that she was trying to be THAT woman. I allowed her to feel like she was. She cooked for me. She kept the house immaculate. If I wanted to hang out with the fellas, she was always cool. The subject of marriage often came up. I did want to be married someday. My parents have been married for over 30 years. I wanted that for myself. I actually thought I'd be married with a couple of kids by now. I was feeling some pressure. My cousin text me that my ex was getting married. It shouldn't have mattered, but it did. I couldn't let it go. A couple of months later, I was engaged. I'm currently planning my wedding. She couldn't be happier. Even though she knows. By the time you read this post, I might be married. Life is about choices. There are plenty of people who marry for the wrong reasons. I'm not. Marriage isn't always about love. I'm getting married so I won't have to be "STILL SINGLE"
We met at work. I was with someone else at the time. We became friends. After I broke up with my ex, we started dating. On our first date, she told me how she felt. I already knew. She'd been waiting for her turn. Our relationship progressed pretty fast. We went from; dating, to being committed, to living together. I realized that she was trying to be THAT woman. I allowed her to feel like she was. She cooked for me. She kept the house immaculate. If I wanted to hang out with the fellas, she was always cool. The subject of marriage often came up. I did want to be married someday. My parents have been married for over 30 years. I wanted that for myself. I actually thought I'd be married with a couple of kids by now. I was feeling some pressure. My cousin text me that my ex was getting married. It shouldn't have mattered, but it did. I couldn't let it go. A couple of months later, I was engaged. I'm currently planning my wedding. She couldn't be happier. Even though she knows. By the time you read this post, I might be married. Life is about choices. There are plenty of people who marry for the wrong reasons. I'm not. Marriage isn't always about love. I'm getting married so I won't have to be "STILL SINGLE"
Thursday, September 22, 2011
WOULD YOU HAPPEN TO HAVE ANY.....
GUM? You know when your breath stinks. Don't you? I totally understand, you just had salmon. You don't have any breath mints handy. You just woke up. A little morning breath. I get it. But your breath ALWAYS stinks. You must be rotten inside. When is the last time you been to the dentist? Maybe you need a colonic. I don't know. But a woman THAT FINE, should not have breath that bad.
I saw her on the dance floor. I said to myself "Imma get me some of that". And I did. She seemed really cool. She was a elementary school teacher. We talked on the phone for about week. She always had a crazy story to share about her kids. We made plans to hang out. A movie and some drinks. When I picked her up, she gave me hug. She was telling me one of her stories and started to laugh. It was like a black cloud came out of her mouth. I had never smelled anything so bad. The whole night I tried to keep her quiet. She was a talker. Every time she leaned towards me, I pulled back. Didn't she know her breath stank? I decided to stop at 7-eleven. I grabbed some snacks for me and breath mints for her. I figured that would help. IT DIDN'T. We arrived at her house. She wanted a kiss good bye. I told her I don't kiss on the first date. Then handed her the box of Altoids. I hope she got the hint. Still Single
I saw her on the dance floor. I said to myself "Imma get me some of that". And I did. She seemed really cool. She was a elementary school teacher. We talked on the phone for about week. She always had a crazy story to share about her kids. We made plans to hang out. A movie and some drinks. When I picked her up, she gave me hug. She was telling me one of her stories and started to laugh. It was like a black cloud came out of her mouth. I had never smelled anything so bad. The whole night I tried to keep her quiet. She was a talker. Every time she leaned towards me, I pulled back. Didn't she know her breath stank? I decided to stop at 7-eleven. I grabbed some snacks for me and breath mints for her. I figured that would help. IT DIDN'T. We arrived at her house. She wanted a kiss good bye. I told her I don't kiss on the first date. Then handed her the box of Altoids. I hope she got the hint. Still Single
Wednesday, September 21, 2011
I TEXTED YOU LAST NIGHT?...OH I TWEETED YOU......
BACK. There is a NEW language of love. Its called TECHNOLOGY. No one talks anymore. I call you. You text me. I leave you a message. You in box. I email you. You instant message me. What is going on? Relationships have become VIRTUAL. They don't seem REAL. It 's like we are ALL living in the Matrix. Neo was right. "There is no SPOON".
He FRIENDED me on Face Book. I didn't even remember who he was. We went to the same High school. I checked his STATUS. We were both single. After a couple of COMMENT exhanges, I INSTANT MESSAGED him. Our messaging became more flirty. I sent him my number. He TEXTED me the next day. I texted him back that night. He asked me to SEND him a PIC. I did. Somebody SHARED a link on my twitter page. I texted him "do you have a twitter account"? He did. I shared the link on his TIME LINE. He TWEETED me right back, "Cool"! He sent his regular "GM" text. I tweeted him right back, "@...... whats up?" Things were going well! We'd been in a relationship for about a month. He IN BOXED me "what are you doing this weekend"? I POSTED on his WALL "nothing". He wanted to HOOK UP on Friday. I instant messaged him, "what time"? He EMAILED eight o'clock. Then he sent the link to his SKYPE. I wonder what I should wear?
Still Single
He FRIENDED me on Face Book. I didn't even remember who he was. We went to the same High school. I checked his STATUS. We were both single. After a couple of COMMENT exhanges, I INSTANT MESSAGED him. Our messaging became more flirty. I sent him my number. He TEXTED me the next day. I texted him back that night. He asked me to SEND him a PIC. I did. Somebody SHARED a link on my twitter page. I texted him "do you have a twitter account"? He did. I shared the link on his TIME LINE. He TWEETED me right back, "Cool"! He sent his regular "GM" text. I tweeted him right back, "@...... whats up?" Things were going well! We'd been in a relationship for about a month. He IN BOXED me "what are you doing this weekend"? I POSTED on his WALL "nothing". He wanted to HOOK UP on Friday. I instant messaged him, "what time"? He EMAILED eight o'clock. Then he sent the link to his SKYPE. I wonder what I should wear?
Still Single
Tuesday, September 20, 2011
WHAT DO YOU MEAN YOU CAN'T....
READ? We are all works in progress. Some things are more of a challenge. Nobody is perfect. We can be ashamed of our deficits. It could be health related. It could be finances. Maybe a bad decision with the law. Everyone wants to improve SOMETHING. I am no different. I'd like to grow with someone. I'm a supportive woman. I'm up for any challenge. Or am I?
I was getting gas. He pulled next to my car. I thought I looked a mess. He thought I was kinda cute. We started talking that night. He told me he had his own business. He did home improvements. Our first few dates, he fixed everything in my house. He was really good with his hands. He didn't talk very much. I figured he was shy. He was a country boy. The simple things he appreciated. I wanted to show him some city life. We made plans for dinner and a movie. My treat. I made the reservation and told him the time. When he picked me up, he asked a lot questions about the menu. I told him they had a good selection for him to choose. He kept asking what was I going to order. I finally told him. We arrived at the restaurant. He didn't look at the menu. He just ordered what I ordered. After dinner, I suggested we pick up a paper. We had to decide a movie and time. I handed him the paper. He said he didn't care. I told him it was his choice. He became frustrated and said he didn't want to go. I asked him what was wrong. He finally said, "I CAN'T READ"! I was thrown. He told me that he had dropped out of high school. He memorized most things. New items were a challenge. I wanted to help him. I wanted to say that THIS was ok. It wasn't. I know couples have to work together. I'm not asking for too much. If I'm able to pay for the meal. You should be able to READ the menu.
Still Single
I was getting gas. He pulled next to my car. I thought I looked a mess. He thought I was kinda cute. We started talking that night. He told me he had his own business. He did home improvements. Our first few dates, he fixed everything in my house. He was really good with his hands. He didn't talk very much. I figured he was shy. He was a country boy. The simple things he appreciated. I wanted to show him some city life. We made plans for dinner and a movie. My treat. I made the reservation and told him the time. When he picked me up, he asked a lot questions about the menu. I told him they had a good selection for him to choose. He kept asking what was I going to order. I finally told him. We arrived at the restaurant. He didn't look at the menu. He just ordered what I ordered. After dinner, I suggested we pick up a paper. We had to decide a movie and time. I handed him the paper. He said he didn't care. I told him it was his choice. He became frustrated and said he didn't want to go. I asked him what was wrong. He finally said, "I CAN'T READ"! I was thrown. He told me that he had dropped out of high school. He memorized most things. New items were a challenge. I wanted to help him. I wanted to say that THIS was ok. It wasn't. I know couples have to work together. I'm not asking for too much. If I'm able to pay for the meal. You should be able to READ the menu.
Still Single
Monday, September 19, 2011
OUR LOVE ISN'T TAINTED.. IT SHOULDN'T MATTER THAT SHE'S A
STRIPPER. I frequent strip clubs. Yeah I'm there for lunch. What man doesn't enjoy a good lap dance with a steak? It's relaxing. It's an escape from your reality. I watch them on stage twirling and gyrating. Its more than taking off your clothes. Its an art form. It takes skill and talent to be up on that pole. It's an honest days work. They are providing a service. Maybe you can't turn a ho into a housewife. But she's not a ho! She's a STRIPPER.
The very first time I saw her, I knew we had a connection. The place was just nasty. Men were drunk, tables were sticky and the bathrooms were filled with smoke. All around you, was TITTIES and ASS. She was different. When she got on that stage, it was like nobody else was in that room . I started tipping her more. I knew her REAL name. We would chat after her set. I knew she had two kids. She graduated from the same High School. She wasn't just a stripper. She was starting her own clothing line. I found myself liking this woman. I could tell she felt the same. When I walked in the door, she knew I was there. She would dance just for ME. I would watch her for hours sliding on the floor, touching herself. I couldn't take my eyes off of her. I would jerk off thinking about her. I was falling en love with her. I wanted to be with her. I waited for the right moment to ask her out. She said when? We started dating. At first, I think I was in awe. Then reality hit. We didn't have crazy sex every night. She was always complaining. "Who are you with"? "Where have you been"? "I need some money"! She was always in the mirror, PRACTICING. She reminded me often how lucky I was. I wanted her to stop stripping. She wouldn't. She said the money was too good. I didn't understand. I was giving her EVERYTHING. What else did she want? I broke it off. I heard she was still stripping at the same spot. I guess we were both back to our REALITIES. Still Single
The very first time I saw her, I knew we had a connection. The place was just nasty. Men were drunk, tables were sticky and the bathrooms were filled with smoke. All around you, was TITTIES and ASS. She was different. When she got on that stage, it was like nobody else was in that room . I started tipping her more. I knew her REAL name. We would chat after her set. I knew she had two kids. She graduated from the same High School. She wasn't just a stripper. She was starting her own clothing line. I found myself liking this woman. I could tell she felt the same. When I walked in the door, she knew I was there. She would dance just for ME. I would watch her for hours sliding on the floor, touching herself. I couldn't take my eyes off of her. I would jerk off thinking about her. I was falling en love with her. I wanted to be with her. I waited for the right moment to ask her out. She said when? We started dating. At first, I think I was in awe. Then reality hit. We didn't have crazy sex every night. She was always complaining. "Who are you with"? "Where have you been"? "I need some money"! She was always in the mirror, PRACTICING. She reminded me often how lucky I was. I wanted her to stop stripping. She wouldn't. She said the money was too good. I didn't understand. I was giving her EVERYTHING. What else did she want? I broke it off. I heard she was still stripping at the same spot. I guess we were both back to our REALITIES. Still Single
Saturday, September 17, 2011
YES SHE'S WITH .....
ME, SERIOUSLY! I see people looking. I know what they are thinking. "Why is HE with HER?" Maybe she isn't the MOST attractive person. Looks aren't everything. She's a good person. She has a great personality. I love her sense of humor. We have alot in common. WHAT? I've had plenty of beautiful girlfriends. I know my friends had me marrying a BEY ONCE type. But Seriously, THIS is my girlfriend. Why don't you believe me?
I was reading the paper at Star bucks. She mentioned an article in the metro section. We just hit it off. She wasn't exactly my type. She didn't have much of a body. She had no style. She had natural hair, which I liked. She just didn't seem to know what to do with it. She had some NICE features. Her face just, WASN'T. We'd been dating pretty serious for about 5 months. I hadn't introduced her to any of my friends or family. They can be so judgemental. I didn't want to subject her to their petty ridicule. My best friend was getting married. She over heard me talking about the rehearsal dinner. I was feeling anxious. My friends wanted to meet her. She wanted to meet them. I decided it was time. I wanted her to make a good first impression. I knew she wasn't really in to fashion. My ex used to shop at this boutique. She was always fly. I made a few suggestions on what she could wear. I had a friend who wore her hair natural but it was styled really nice. I gave her the number to the shop. The night of the event, she actually looked nice. I told her how good she looked. "They are going to love you". While we were driving, I noticed she was upset. I asked her what was wrong. She said after the dinner she wanted to go home. She didn't want to see me again. I didn't understand. We were so happy. I wasn't cheating on her. I didn't abuse her. I paid for everything. I just didn't get it. The dinner was over and we were at her house. Before she got out she asked me, "did I play the part"? "What part"? "Being HER"!
Still Single
I was reading the paper at Star bucks. She mentioned an article in the metro section. We just hit it off. She wasn't exactly my type. She didn't have much of a body. She had no style. She had natural hair, which I liked. She just didn't seem to know what to do with it. She had some NICE features. Her face just, WASN'T. We'd been dating pretty serious for about 5 months. I hadn't introduced her to any of my friends or family. They can be so judgemental. I didn't want to subject her to their petty ridicule. My best friend was getting married. She over heard me talking about the rehearsal dinner. I was feeling anxious. My friends wanted to meet her. She wanted to meet them. I decided it was time. I wanted her to make a good first impression. I knew she wasn't really in to fashion. My ex used to shop at this boutique. She was always fly. I made a few suggestions on what she could wear. I had a friend who wore her hair natural but it was styled really nice. I gave her the number to the shop. The night of the event, she actually looked nice. I told her how good she looked. "They are going to love you". While we were driving, I noticed she was upset. I asked her what was wrong. She said after the dinner she wanted to go home. She didn't want to see me again. I didn't understand. We were so happy. I wasn't cheating on her. I didn't abuse her. I paid for everything. I just didn't get it. The dinner was over and we were at her house. Before she got out she asked me, "did I play the part"? "What part"? "Being HER"!
Still Single
Thursday, September 15, 2011
ARE YOU SURE? HOW MANY DAYS HAS IT BEEN....YES...
FOOL I'M PREGNANT! I was confused. Maybe we did have a future. Maybe we didn't. I can barely take care of myself. I can't take care of another human being. I don't even like small children. Women have the right to choose. ONE decision can effect THREE lives. I never thought I would feel this way. I don't feel any connection. I don't want this baby. I'm going to have an abortion. A LIFE for a LIFE. MINE first!
We'd been messing around for years. I never thought we would be TOGETHER. He wasn't the marrying type. That night, we didn't have a condom. We did it any way. When it was time for him to pull out, he didn't. I reminded him that I WASN'T on the pill. He said "chill out, we're good". A month or so later, I was pregnant. I was actually seeing someone ELSE. This was awkward. I was embarrassed to tell anyone. I had just started a new job. Moved into a new apartment. What would people think? "Another single black woman with a BABY". I didn't want to be considered a statistic. I decided I wasn't going to have IT. I made an appointment at the clinic. I waited for his sorry ass to pick me up. He said he over slept. I made ANOTHER appointment. My girl was going to take me. They completed my exam and told me that I was further along. I didn't have enough money. I couldn't believe this sh**t. I made a third appointment. The night before, I had a dream. A baby girl was sleeping on my lap. I didn't want my life to change. I didn't know anything about children. WE would never be a couple. This was for the best. Years later, I think about that time. I know I made the right the decision. He's 17 now.
STILL SINGLE
We'd been messing around for years. I never thought we would be TOGETHER. He wasn't the marrying type. That night, we didn't have a condom. We did it any way. When it was time for him to pull out, he didn't. I reminded him that I WASN'T on the pill. He said "chill out, we're good". A month or so later, I was pregnant. I was actually seeing someone ELSE. This was awkward. I was embarrassed to tell anyone. I had just started a new job. Moved into a new apartment. What would people think? "Another single black woman with a BABY". I didn't want to be considered a statistic. I decided I wasn't going to have IT. I made an appointment at the clinic. I waited for his sorry ass to pick me up. He said he over slept. I made ANOTHER appointment. My girl was going to take me. They completed my exam and told me that I was further along. I didn't have enough money. I couldn't believe this sh**t. I made a third appointment. The night before, I had a dream. A baby girl was sleeping on my lap. I didn't want my life to change. I didn't know anything about children. WE would never be a couple. This was for the best. Years later, I think about that time. I know I made the right the decision. He's 17 now.
STILL SINGLE
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